Let's Go!

"I'll show you how to live." 

-I AM, I WAS, I WILL ALWAYS BE

It feels good when a decision you've been pondering over has finally been made.
It feels good.
It also feels good, not because the world around you suddenly exudes peace, but because you have a bit of that peace within you--and that's all you need.
It's all I need.
And it feels good.

Okay floaty intro over.
I'm deciding to end my time at Union College with the end of this semester.
And I'm deciding to share this decision/announcement with most of you via blog post because I'm just better at sharing my feelings and reason in written words rather than using the verbal ones.

WHY?

Why you ask? Why not finish the degree? Why not continue my schooling?
Well...

Because its finally a decision that I'm making for me. It's not that I was forced to come to Union. It's not that I haven't learned a lot in my time here. It's just that this decision to continue my education and "get a real job" was a thought fed to me continually in various interactions around me. Also, I am the biggest one to blame for the falsehood. Because I chose to believe the lie. The lie that my life was worth nothing if I didn't graduate college and get a "traditional" career-such as being a high school English teacher.

WHY?

Because he told me to blame it on him. And I won't entirely, but this is definitely a reason I'm leaving college. My boyfriend Robert. I swore I'd never be one of those girls to give up her education or career for a guy. And I'm still not one of those girls. However, I blame part of my reason for this decision on him because he definitely was the one who helped to encourage me to make a decision for reasons that weren't out of fear.

WHY?

Because I am continuing my schooling. Life is school. Time is learning. I don't end my education because I'm not paying tuition or living in a dorm. If anything, I feel that I've learned so much in my four years out of college than I have in my year and a half being away at college.

So to all my Unionites, I love you all. I have enjoyed being able to be a part of a school body. I have enjoyed learning what it means to live at school. Eat, breathe, work, and dream book-learning (no sarcasm here I actually enjoyed it all). I have learned what its like to be around hundreds of people your own age. It's been weird. It's been wonderful. It's been.

Thank you to my teachers, pastors, work supervisors out here in the mid-west. People I've danced with, laughed with. Thanks for showing me your Nebraska.
Okay I am still here until December the 14th so if you want to say goodbye in person I'll be around. Otherwise I'm excited and ready to head back home.

Back to ol' Virginie!
East coast here I come!

p.s. if you've read this far and haven't heard the song in the video above doom on you...lol not really but kinda!

So...let's make it official

One of the longer blog posts. But after being absent for several months you don't mind right? That's right all three of you who read this blog post--I'm looking at you guys.

Blue hues

Holmes lake on a Thursday night two weeks ago was gorgeous for the walker with her camera. A chilly yet comfortable 50 degrees, encouraged a sweater to be worn and then removed when the walking was fast enough to produce warmth. Pictures and videos of the scenery were taken which resulted in the following video. 

"Fire to Smoke" was a created project made in lieu of a research paper for my Biblical Literature class at Union College. Thanks to the help of my fellow students and friends, I was able to capture and interpret the moment of Moses' interaction with the bush in a way that I pictured it in my head. Floating and moving, a dancer becomes light as God's voice is heard calling Moses. The video is meant to be more of abstract moments. Imagine Moses at the end of his life on earth thinking back on that interaction which was the catalyst to the unfolding of events which we call the great Exodus out of Egypt.

It's been awhile...

It felt so rewarding to produce something that was an interpretive video featuring dance, narration, and music. The last project I had done similar to this one was probably five or six years ago for another college class. As I've been rethinking this entire education-to-become-a-high-school-english-teacher plan, videography is something I'm coming back to. 

Why videography?

     I first came across a High School Musical fan made video when YouTube was a baby back in 2006. When the new year began, I created my first YouTube account named "bluesalad" which was to become my nickname and brand name for this videography hobby turned career. From slideshows to actual music videos I began as a simple fan-vidder. Joining a community on YouTube helped me through those rough teenage years.
     When the real world was rejecting me, the online world embraced me. 9 years later (six YouTube accounts later), I'm in the process of editing two wedding videos, I've created over two hundred fan videos, videos for my church and youth-group, more than a dozen high school grad videos, and other extras here and there for the various friend groups and projects I've been a part of.
     Editing was my schooling for a good part of seven years and I've enjoyed trying to "perfect" the art. There is no such thing as perfection. Especially in editing. Things can always be better. And I love the challenge that is the editing game-a fight against time. You never are sure how much time you'll need on a specific project. Some projects take thirty minutes, others take 5-8 hours. Still others, need countless days to build up the courage to begin. Yet, this is why I love the art.
And the comments afterwards are worth those long hours staring at the screen. They are worth the repeated plays, memorized songs etc;
And I've realized. After 9 years, this is my life. I can't just put it away that simply. And so I'll continue.
In the world where everyone is a video editor I will push through and offer my skill set. 

So that's it for now folks!

I'm off to editing a few more projects here. I'm gonna try to push them out...then hopefully you'll see the results in the next month or so. 

My dream is to be able to make this into a steady business stream. Why? Because this is an art form and work I love to do. And it is something I find myself doing during college studies, during the times I should be working on something "more important" editing is still there. This is how I know its something that is not just a passing interest for me. It is something I have to do. So why not try to make the thing I have to do my job? Because it's already a job. 

So let's make it official.

A Way of Life

I think this is my first blog post about dance. Well here we go folks!
The above video and dance were made and choreographed by dancer Emilio who goes as IaMEmiliodosal on Youtube. His friend had been diagnosed with Lupus. 

       I had previously watched a similar choreographed piece on the show So You Think You Can Dance several years back and that was the one that stuck with me. However, this piece is so much more put together, as well as performed in such a beautiful outdoor environment it has replaced the other piece as my favorite. And done to this song Fix You by Coldplay that has always envoked such a feeling of longing--it is amazing what music and movement does when put together!
        I believe God works in mysterious ways as well as in obvious ones. When I attended my first dance class at age 12 in a friend's living room I would never have known how much I would love movement. Today, dance is a way of my life. After dancing with a Christian dance ministry, teaching and trying out several styles from Ballet and Lyrical to Hip Hop and Lindy-hop I am moving constantly to music. Whenever there is sound of melody and rhythm it is unusual if I am still.
        For someone like me who does not enjoy being candid with their emotions, dance is my outlet. It is how I can freely express my emotions and still feel safe. Dance is a way of life. I have introduced many friends and am grateful to the many others who have also evangelized their love of movement towards me.
        So to those who are afraid of movement, give it a try. To those who move, move MORE! Dance and dance and dance and dance until your feet are sore and your heart is full and your mind has shed all of its negative emotions. Dance to release. Dance not to impress but express!

Family pictures

Sending you love from the sunny island of Guam, 8 am and the chilly, landlocked state of Nebraska 3 pm.

Missing Roswena and Seth from this family pic. Maybe next time we can skype them in too!

#missmyfamily

This internet gathering did me good this Sabbath afternoon. I've been feeling really homesick these past few days. I know why. It is because I have been seeing and doing a lot of activities that remind me of my past. 

Last night, I had the opportunity to worship dance as Moses's mother in a drama based on the movie Prince of Egypt. It was a throwback to In His Steps performance Run Wild, Live Free, Love Strong of the Exodus story where I also danced as Moses's mommy. 

Missions Emphasis week came and went and all the while I have been thinking of going as a student missionary and getting the opportunity to maybe go to Guam and work with my family at the academy there.

Another skype call with childhood friends who are also away at college brings me back to good times.

Even friends here at school remind me of the ones I've left behind.

It is not that these times now aren't good. They are just different. And while I understand change is good and we must always move on, I finally understand why all the adults in my life always said, "Cherish these moments." 

Lately I have tried to experience every opportunity as rich and full as I can. Who knows what will change? God always brings us on new adventures. And while I can't wait for that new horizon, it's always bittersweet to shake the dust off your sandals and move on to those new opportunities. 

Now is good too.

Wednesday Wonderings

      We are so utterly ordinary, so commonplace, while we profess to know a Power the twentieth century does not reckon with. But we are “harmless,” and therefore unharmed. We are spiritual pacifists, non-militants, conscientious objectors in this battle-to-the-death with principalities and powers in high places. Meekness must be had for contact with men, but brass, outspoken boldness is required to take part in the comradeship of the Cross. We are “sideliners” — coaching and criticizing the real wrestlers while content to sit by and leave the enemies of God unchallenged. The world cannot hate us, we are too much like its own. Oh that God would make us dangerous.

 -Jim Elliot

The Case of the Missing Transcript...and Other Miracles

I want to move on. On to other worries and stresses.

I will not forget

Today God worked a miracle.

I will not forget

After finishing a movie on the power and fight of prayer I opened my mailbox and pulled out my missing transcript. Smiling I walk up the stairs to my dorm room.

I will not forget

Yesterday an email: "You will be dropped from your classes and asked to leave for this semester if you do not complete registration by tomorrow at 5 pm."

An uplifting call from a friend, no, a sister.

I will not forget

Going to bed with worries. But worries that were given away. 
Waking up to a new day. Fresh, with no mistakes.
I strive to enjoy not endure my first class.

I will not forget

I long to be bold as the first Christians were. Confident in my Lord who WILL come to the rescue. Unafraid of what will come. Knowing He will pull me through, I exit the classroom. My phone rings.

I check my email

"I've checked 'Transcript' off your registry clearance checklist..."
Praise God. 1 done, 1 to go.

I will not forget

"Funds have been received..."

I will not forget

Celebration. God is good. Of course He was! Of course He is! This is no little thing! 

I will not forget

Last week He prepared me. The story of Jacob wrestling with God. That was me.
A heart to heart with a total stranger about the giver of lies and the ungodliness of being self-sufficient. 2 times this past week hearing the same thing: test everything to God for truth. 

I will not forget

Ask Him, "What is my testimony?"

I will not forget

My prayer is and was: This life is yours. Your education. This is Your education. You called me here. You will provide for me. That is the promise. 

I will remember

This life is a gift. Each day is a gift. Let's not take ANYTHING for granted!!!!!

Also, thanks to Sean for giving me this really cool gift featured in this fancy picture! Thanks Sean!

When you think all you're getting is crap. STOP and look back

I returned to my dorm room unimpressed and readily depressed upon the thought of beginning a new semester of studies. Cleaning, unpacking, and untangling what I had brought and left behind, I began and ended a chat with a good friend. She is mostly an opposite. Always a story, always living in amazement of life, and always ready to share. Thanking God for our friendship I pressed the red button and returned to my room. I was cleaning out. The box was already full with "give-aways" and yet I knew I was merely making a mark. I had asked her to guess what I was doing. "Unpacking and listening to Jana Kramer," was the guess. One of them was correct. "I am also cleaning out and making a pile of things to give away in case I can't pay for this semester and have to leave in a hurry." 

Cleaning out a sandy bag, from one of my last visits to the Atlantic, I stood over the trash bin shaking out bits of paper, old hair scrunchies, and bent bobby pins.

I pulled the bill out.

Falling to my knees I prayed, rejoiced, thanked, asked for forgiveness for my unbelief.

After all He's done: 

1) Saved me the $100 fee for late registration by completing requirements at the beginning of the fall semester.

2) Scholarships came through, financial aid

3) Generous friends and church family

4) Letters and boxes of support

5) I prayed and He gave me my request of a worship dance group

6) I prayed and He gave me friends and family

7) Opportunities, upon opportunities

8) Reunions, unexpected and long awaited

9) Freedom to choose to doubt Him


"No, we do not need gas money."

"Would you like a place to stay tonight?"

"Here is a little something to help with school."

"I have a question for you..."

And the blessings continue to rain down. 

Lord, keep making me by breaking me. May I be Your servant. I am excited to continue on this journey with you as we start this new semester, this new year. Use me, Lord!

~BlueSalad~